Like too many others, I can't/won't ask for help. I found this pic on Renee's blog (she finds the most amazing pictures):
Thursday, July 23, 2009
My Support Network
I am feeling pretty good this morning. I could never have got through this last week without my support group (especially with Nancy away!) I have had lots of phone calls and e-mails, supportive comments on my blog, my sister brought Friday's dinner and played Scrabble with me Friday and Saturday to help pass the time, and brought my dad over for a visit. My boys have been great - when I broke down crying they called Brad to come home and stayed very close to me. Brad got his mom to come over until he got home. Dave brought Wendy's Frostees for all of us. Barb brought me beautiful fresh fruit. Brad's mom made us lasagne for dinner the next day, baked us a carrot cake, and yesterday morning when Zach got up and said 'mom, is there any cinnamon buns for breakfast' - she actually showed up with cinnamon buns 2 minutes later (total coincidence). And she took both boys to their orthodontist appointments this week. Brad's sister comes by with good advice. My nurse Bonnie who called me back 3 times to check on me. Brad has been wonderful, I know it's hard for him when I feel bad and he can't make it go away, but he's always there for me. Knowing so many people care has really helped pull me through this. THANK YOU!!
Like too many others, I can't/won't ask for help. I found this pic on Renee's blog (she finds the most amazing pictures):
Like too many others, I can't/won't ask for help. I found this pic on Renee's blog (she finds the most amazing pictures):
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Beth, you raise one of the most important aspects of cancer - from diagnosis to treatment to moving back into life. We need that support. It's vital. And we need to ask for it. I was one who never asked for help and always did things myself and did for others. Cancer teaches us many things we need to learn and being able to let go and ask is one of them.
ReplyDeleteOther people have a need to give as well. To be "doers" and when we don't allow that we are denying them something that they need. My best friend wanted to buy me a hat...I was buying my wig and some hats and she wanted to pay for one. I had said "no" feeling badly at taking her money. The man who ran the boutique (in the hospital) told me to allow her to do this. He explained that those around me want to do something, want to make it go away but they can't. Therefore it is up to me to let them do what they can so that they feel they are helping. When he put it like that I "got it" like a lightbulb going off. I have since had no problems saying "thank you" to offers, and asking for what I need. I was dx'd in May 2005. Here we are in 2009 and I live my life in a completely different way. Remember...that picture above speaks volumes...you to can start to ask. I know it!! :)
Beth, what a beautiful post.I think many of us do not want to accept help in the beginning but as time goes on we find that it's not because they feel sorry for us but they genuinely want to help us and those generally become our best support. Whether it be blogging friends or family support is always close by.I found a lot of support as well on breastcancer.org. There are wonderful people on there and they are always ready to answer your questions.I have been with them for over a year and have made many friends there and we still keep in touch whether on there or Facebook.
ReplyDeleteSome of the girls always seem to find a picture to make us laugh and I love that.
We are always here for you Beth through the rough times and the good times.
You have a wonderful support group in your family.
I hope you will be able to enjoy the weekend Beth. Take Care.
Jill.
Really and truly, I discovered that it is as big a blessing to be ministered to as it is to minister to others.
ReplyDeleteBeth, it's funny, but I found my 4th chemo the worst. I had six in all, but the 4th one was the absolute worst. I almost quit.
ReplyDeleteIt's sooo good to hear that you have so many around you to hold you up during this time. That is just great!
Sorry I haven't been here lately. I seem to be having some problems with Blogger, but hope it's all fixed now! I've missed keeping up with you!
You truly are surrounded by angels on earth! - which speaks volumes for the love you have created in your life!
ReplyDeleteSheila, B.C.
Sweet Beth I hope you are feeling well today.
ReplyDeleteI went and cuddled Domenic today.
Thank you.
Love Renee xoxo
Much obliged to you for giving such essential data, and a debt of gratitude is for sharing this issue.
ReplyDelete